The Duel – part 1

So this isn’t a blog about a tinder date per se but it is one hell of a story.

Those of you who follow me on facebook will know that while I was  living in London had a relationship with an absolutely wonderful guy for just under two years.  Things didn’t work out between us for a hundred and one reasons but to this day he remains one of my closets and most treasured friends. And this, well this is the story of how we met….

Working for one of the biggest publishing companies in the world came with many perks, exposure to some amazing brands, a fun working environment, drinking at your desks, fancy dress days, and an array of fantastically talented people. With over 400 staff working in the busy media building on Shaftsbury Avenue in the heart of London I was sure that I would meet many a handsome work colleague by the water cooler on a Monday morning. Well that’s what I hoped for anyway as I packed up my belongings and shipped my life from Dublin to London for a new job and a dive head first into a bigger and far more diverse pond. I had repeatedly failed to find my OTL amongst the cobbled streets of Dublin at 3am after having downed  many a jaegerbomb with my ultimate wingwoman. Saturday nights in Coppers had run its course and I decided that perhaps my OTL was waiting for me beneath  the bright lights of Picadilly Circus.

My hopes were dashed within the first week or two of the job when I realised that most of the people working on my floor were women, the ones that were men were either married or in relationships and the ones that were single were single for a reason. I sipped my water from the cooler and forlornly surveyed the room realising that there wasn’t a single man who took my fancy. That was until about three months in as I rounded the corner to the tech department and was stopped in my tracks by what I can only describe as an Adonis of a man.

Tall, muscly, hair like James Dean and an air of mystery that set my heart a flutter.

I scarpered back to my desk and whispered (loudly exclaimed) to my work wife “Oh my god, who the hell is the hot new guy in tech”. She giggled “oh I knew you’d like him, yeah he’s the hot new guy in tech, started last week as a back end developer <insert dirty joke here>, he’s hot eh” Hot didn’t cut it. This guy was a certifiable ride and I made it my mission to get with him.

I suddenly developed lots of serious tech issues that needed sorting immediately and regularly found myself in his department speaking to his boss outrageously fluttering my eyelashes and swishing my hair as best I could but HNGIT barely looked up from his screen. He sat low in his chair, long legs stretched out in front with earphones in and long lashed eyes glued to a black screen full of coloured code.

I discovered he was a smoker. Rollies that he would expertly make at his desk and stick behind his ear as he waited for code to upload. I figured out his smoking routine and made sure to go for a smoke at the same time as him in the hopes that he would notice me.

“Hey have you got a light?” I asked as he leaned against the wall scrolling through his phone.

“Oh, eh, yep” he said fishing in his pocket for a scratched silver zippo.

He was shy and quiet and I found myself rambling like an idiot whenever I was in his company but somehow I managed to steal snippets of information about him between my nervous stream on conscious. He lived in Kent and commuted everyday to work. It was his first time working in London so he didn’t know the city too well, he was two years younger than me, he liked Game of thrones and poker and pool. I started smoking a lot more….

To say this was a slow burner was an understatement. It was after my 15th smoke with him over the course of two weeks before I plucked up the courage to send him an IM on the work system. Something lame like “only 3hrs and 44 mins till home time 😊”

“I know this day is dragging eh” came his reply leaving me stumped.

A few hours later an email arrived announcing a big office work party. A quarterly event part funded by monthly contributions from staff and the rest from the company….basically a big giant piss up fancy dress affair, a corporate ploy to make us all forget how badly we were being paid cause … ‘company culture’ yay!

Anyway I didn’t care about all that because finally this was going to be my chance to hook up with HNGIT!

The night before the big party I meticulously planned my outfit, shaved my legs, plucked my brows, fake tanned and painted nails. I was fully prepped and couldn’t wait to run my fingers through that fabulous hair of his. Why I was so confident it was going to happen is anyone guess he hadn’t exactly been showering me with compliments or flirting outrageously with me in the way I hoped he would and yet my self imposed mission had been set and I was one determined lady in lust.

To be continued ….


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